6 November


(TBA EXCLUSIVE)   -   A confidential Obama Transition Team document obtained by the Texas Biodefense Alliance details the plan of the President-Elect's security advisors to launch a bioterror offensive in early 2009. 

The draft, authored by aspiring Obama counselors Dara O'Toole and Pritchard Danzig, calls for Congress to approve the "More Bioweapons Everywhere Act" as its first order of business in 2009.  

The main feature of the More Bioweapons Everywhere Act is a "Bioweapons Bill of Rights" (see below) that the authors say will make America more secure.  

Among its provisions are a permanent "existential threat" from bioweapons with unlimited money to ensure that no American lives far from an unregulated bioterror lab.

The Act also echoes the 2nd Amendment by enshrining the right of Americans to keep and bear bioweapons, and to send them in the mail to their elected officials whenever bioterror spending sags.

The bill also targets possible discrimination against some Americans.  If passed, it will ensure that no criminally insane person, white supremacist, convicted felon, or generally unintelligent or incompetent person will ever be denied access to bioweapons.

A Transition Team spokesman refused to comment on pending legislative initiatives, however, bioweapons experts privately advised that close attention be paid to upcoming appointments, which they say could elevate the bioterror threat to levels above and beyond those of recent Bush administration years.


O'Toole/Danzig draft (proposed) / 5 NOV / CONFIDENTIAL

A BIOWEAPONS BILL OF RIGHTS: The First Bioweapons Initiative of the Obama Administration

H.R. 001 / S.B. 001


(Short name: MORE BIOWEAPONS EVERYWHERE Act of 2009)

[preambular text here]

Congress therefore adopts this BIOWEAPONS BILL OF RIGHTS:

1. All Americans shall enjoy an existential threat from bioweapons and the obligation to perpetually pay for its maintenance and expansion.

2. A non-regulated bioweapons militia being necessary to the security of an unfree state, the right of the people to keep and bear bioweapons, and to send them through the mails to the legislative branch and the media whenever enthusiasm for bioweapons research and development flags, shall not be infringed.

3. A local bioweapons lab operating free of effective government and public oversight is the inalienable right of every American.

4. Geographical circumstances, such as propensity for catastrophic natural disaster or resistance of the local populace, shall never be a basis for discriminating against equal access to biodefense labs for all the people.

5. All experiments with bioweapons agents shall be considered to be for peaceful and prophylactic purposes without regard to intent, actual activity, or how the results are used.

6. Any person describing any research as related to biodefense shall have the right to indefinitely receive federal cash payments and shall not be accountable to anyone.

7. No law shall abridge the obligation of the press to print officially-sanctioned bioweapons fearmongering for the edification of the people.

8. In access to bioweapons agents it is prohibited to discriminate on the basis of race, creed, gender, sexual orientation, paranoid psychosis, multiple personality disorder, homicidal tendency or other mental defect, felony conviction, incarceration, avowed criminal intent, threats to kill healthcare providers, affiliation with white supremacist groups, inexperience, or absence of common sense or appropriate facilities, except if said person was born in the wrong place, has a Arab-sounding surname, or may otherwise be suspected of possibly belonging to a terrorist ethnic group.

9. All Americans shall enjoy the freedom to shop for as much duct tape and as many gas masks as they see fit.

10. Congress offers the full faith and credit of the United States to provide all funds necessary to purchase a minimum of one hundred million courses / doses of all new products claimed to be effective in treatment of bioweapons diseases, without regard to price, efficacy, FDA approval, the true burden of infectious disease on the people, or any actual public health priority.

O'Toole/Danzig draft (proposed) / 5 NOV / CONFIDENTIAL